I’ve read so many books on marriage that I should be a champ by now. Well, that’s not the case. I’ve taught enough marriage conferences that you’d think I was an expert – epic fail! I’ve been married to two very unique women over the course of 36 years and I have gotten better at this married life, so I wanted to offer you four short, but not always simple steps to a happy, healthy marriage for the holidays.
Here You Go – FOUR Sure Wins in Your Marriage,
Even in the Holiday Rush!
- BE HUMBLE IN ALL THINGS! At some point, we will all be humbled. Why not offer that as a gift to your spouse this Christmas and beyond. They may not recognize you, but I promise you that they’ll love you even more for it. Humility is the great balm for hurting, angry spouses.
James 4:6 “And he gives grace generously. As the Scriptures say, “God opposes the proud, but gives grace to the humble.”
- BE HONEST AT ALL COSTS! You might think that you are keeping something from them that might freak them out, but I’ve never met a spouse that later said, “Gosh I am so glad that I didn’t know this because I would have hated to have helped.”
James 5:16 “Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The earnest prayer of a righteous person has great power and produces wonderful results.”
- STOP TRYING TO PROVE SOMETHING AND FORGIVE! The greatest way to move forward in a challenging marriage, or to make a good marriage even better is to practice the art and attitude of forgiveness. Stop harboring bitterness and resentment. You can forgive your spouse, even when they don’t know that they needed it. Jesus was pretty clear: Forgive as you have been forgiven.
Ephesians 4:31-32 “Get rid of all bitterness, rage, anger, harsh words, and slander, as well as all types of evil behavior. Instead, be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you.
- SEE YOUR RELATIONSHIP BEYOND THE TWO OF YOU! You weren’t just God’s gifts to each other, you – the two of you – are to be gifts that the Divine uses to make a difference in so many people’s lives. Step up your game as a couple and give more, serve more, and live more with open hands!
Matthew 28:19-20 “Therefore, go and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit. Teach these new disciples to obey all the commands I have given you. And be sure of this: I am with you always, even to the end of the age.”
I’ve heard for years that marriage is 50-50. What a load of poop that is. Marriage is 100-100. Every single day, you have got to collectively get to 200%. There are days when I’ve got about 80% in me, and Jenny totes the rock up the hill and delivers 120%. This really isn’t as hard as it sounds. It’s simply an outward reflection of the true love that you have for the gift that God gave you to be the love of your life!
Merry Christmas Marriage, AChuck