Achuckallen

Instigating Better

Friendship

If You Aren’t Perfect…

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Maybe I am the only person that has felt the sting of imperfection, daily. I’m so far from perfect that I couldn’t even see perfect with the Hubble Telescope. Or maybe there are plenty of us out there and we just don’t talk about our imperfections, frailties, insecurities and failures?

I think there are plenty of us that recognize our significant peculiarities and the challenges that they present. But why then do we see through the lenses of social media, our veneered, perfectly wonderful lives?

I listened to a podcast recently from a distant hero of mine, Michele Cushatt. Michele is a speaker, author, coach and part of leadership team at Michael Hyatt and Company. She is brave, brilliant, powerful, full of faith and a source of wisdom and encouragement.

If you are one my fellow messed up pilgrims in this life of ours, I urge you to listen to THIS PODCAST. When you have listened to this episode, stop and invite the God of all Creation to simultaneously soften your heart for the folks in your relational circles that aren’t perfect, while thickening your skin to the sting of criticism and shame.

I promise you that you’ll be encouraged and strengthened by listening to Michele Cushatt.

As Always—-Go in Peace,
AChuck

If I Were 17 Again

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If I Were 17 Again by AChuckAllen

Even with the odd graduations of 2020, it would appear that we will be going back to school this fall. As a result, I started thinking about the things I would do differently if I were about to start my senior year at South Gwinnett High School again.

I enjoyed my high school years, well at least a couple of them. My dad moved us several times during my four years, but I wound up attending three schools, but two schools for three years. I know, it was odd.

I have fond memories of my short time at Southwest Dekalb High School, which I attended for one fall and then we were off to South Gwinnett. There we stayed for almost two full years and we made a stop in Lubbock, Texas. I attended a few Summer School classes attempting to avoid sitting out a year of varsity football. That summer turned out to be a great year and held one of my favorite adventures of high school. I was 15 years old, living with Mom and Dad in Texas. I would have had to sit out a football season and so, moving back to Georgia was my highest priority. So, I left Mom, Dad and the sweetest little girlfriend, Deanna and drove myself (remember-15 years old) from Lubbock, Texas directly to Camp Bow and Arrow for football camp with my teammates – The Not So Mighty South Gwinnett Comets. That trip at 15 years old included a night of sleep in the back of my Monte Carlo in Vicksburg, Mississippi. Sometimes being stupid will cause you to grow up in a hurry. So, after that little bypass, here are my re-wishes.

If I could relive a few of those senior days, I would have:

1. I wish that I had been less of a butthead and been a nicer human being. Especially to kids that were struggling.

2. I wish I had been a real Follower of Christ, not a convenient Christian with no spiritual guts at all.

3. I wish I had played every single play like I was one yard away from winning the Super Bowl. I loved playing ball!

4. I wish I would have said yes to Troy.

5. I wish I would have focused more on literature and actually listened to Mrs. Adair. I didn’t particularly like her.

6. I wish I had started intentionally reading earlier in life…like as in at 17.

7. I wish I would have made that one tackle that got away from me while playing the coldest game of my life at Elbert County. That dude was big.

8. I wish I would have kicked the guy playing over me as I was long snapping while at Habersham County in the privates. I don’t even know his name, but I still hate him.

9. I wish I would have treated my Mom and Dad with more respect. When you are 17-18 years old you really are an idiot.

10. And finally, I wish that I would have honored my coaches for the painstaking efforts they poured into me. I’d still try and run through a wall for any of them..especially Coaches Strickland, Johnson, Carter and Sawyer.

We don’t have the luxury of reliving our past, but we can pass along our hard earned knowledge to those that come behind us. So, feel free to share these and your desired mulligans with the kids that will start their Senior years this Fall.

Go in Peace, AChuck

GRIT is Your Superpower

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GRIT is Your Superpower by ACHUCKallen

John Wayne was one of America’s great actors and great Americans. He somehow seemed bigger than life, and that may have been a result of the fact that he was popular in the age before social media took over!

My two favorite John Wayne quotes are:

# 1 “Life is tough, but it’s tougher when you’re stupid.”

# 2 “Courage is being scared to death…but saddling up anyway.”

John Wayne won his only Oscar in 1969 for the movie “True Grit.” In the movie, 14 year-old Mattie says to Wayne’s character, Marshall Cogburn, ”They tell me you are a man with true grit.”

Angela Duckworth did her research on what seperated successful people in various high stress situations, from those that crumbled. After an extensive study, one characteristic emerged as a significant predictor of success. And it wasn’t social intelligence. It wasn’t good looks, physical health, and it wasn’t IQ. It was grit.”

The best definition I’ve ever heard of grit is: “Grit is doing what you don’t want to do, to be what you want to be.”

If you want to succeed wildly, you need to develop grit. True grit or more properly put God-honoring GRIT is your super-power. And here is how you get that kind of grit.

Guard Your Heart

Proverbs 4:23-27 ”Guard your heart above all else, for it determines the course of your life. [24] Avoid all perverse talk; stay away from corrupt speech. [25] Look straight ahead, and fix your eyes on what lies before you. [26] Mark out a straight path for your feet; stay on the safe path. [27] Don’t get sidetracked; keep your feet from following evil. …And just how are we going to do that? Let’s start with our emotions.

Reel in Your Emotions

A person with true grit will never give in to the list of following seven emotions. There is a difference between being attacked by these things and allowing them to take you over. The list includes: “anxiety, fear, doubt, guilt, depression, discouragement and jealousy” It is not mind over matter for the Follower of Christ. It is the continual applying of God’ Word to overcome your negative emotions.

Here are the seven.

Anxiety. Philippians 4:6 Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done.

Fear. 2 Timothy 1:7 For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline.

Doubt. Mark 11:23 says:I tell you the truth, you can say to this mountain, ‘May you be lifted up and thrown into the sea,’ and it will happen. But you must really believe it will happen and have no doubt in your heart.

Guilt. Isaiah 43:25 “I-yes, I alone-will blot out your sins for my own sake and will never think of them again.

Depression. Psalm 40:1-2 I waited patiently for the LORD to help me, and he turned to me and heard my cry. He lifted me out of the pit of despair, out of the mud and the mire. He set my feet on solid ground and steadied me as I walked along. He has given me a new song to sing, a hymn of praise to our God. Many will see what he has done and be amazed. They will put their trust in the LORD.

Discouragement. Deuteronomy 31:8 Do not be afraid or discouraged, for the LORD will personally go ahead of you. He will be with you; he will neither fail you nor abandon you.”

Jealousy. 1 Corinthians 13:4 Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud

Tenacity What does the Bible have to say about tenacity? What does the Bible have to say about tenacity? Hebrews 10:36 Patient endurance is what you need now, so that you will continue to do God’s will. Then you will receive all that he has promised.

Amelia Earhart once said: “The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity. The fears are paper tigers. You can do anything you decide to do. You can act to change and control your life; and the procedure, the process is its own reward.”

The strength of a person’s character. . .their grit and drive to success is determined by whether or not they can finish what they started.

Philippians 1:6 “And I am certain that God, who began the good work within you, will continue his work until it is finally finished on the day when Christ Jesus returns.”

If God doesn’t change, and He doesn’t. If His word doesn’t change, and it doesn’t. If God’s promises remain the same, and they do. Then it’s pretty obvious: We need to change.

Acts 3:19 in The Living Bible says: “Now change your mind and attitude to God and turn to him so he can cleanse away your sins and send you wonderful times of refreshment from the presence of the Lord.”

But hear this,“faith is a fact, but you’ve got to act.” Life is full of people who talk about what they’re going to do someday. I have a friend who is one of the most creative people that I’ve ever met, but he has a totally unrealistic view of what it takes to make the things in his mind become a reality. Here’s a word of truth: A creation without implementation with never come to fruition.

Do you want to move from where you are to where God wants you to succeed? Then do something instead of talking about it. Take one step and let Him propel you thru the next 30!

When you read or listen to God’s Word, then simply obey and act on His Word. And when you do, God will bless you and reward you! This is True Grit!

This is how we push past pandemics, failures, market crashes and circumstances outside of our control. Go get your grit on!

CHUCK ALLEN Pastor · Speaker · Author · Coach

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Troop Zero

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TROOP ZERO by AChuckAllen

Jenny and I watched an Amazon Original the other night and I thought it was a must watch for America, especially during this political season of open name calling and deep-state poop that every aisle is slinging. It’s an odd movie with one of the most powerful message that I’ve seen in a long time.

Hear me on this, the language can be a bit salty and the characters are not what many folks would hold up as a model, but I fell in love with the misfit kids and adults of this fictional, tiny town in rural Georgia.

I learned three things from this simple movie.

1. I Greatly Dislike Mean People. I’m serious. I know that mean people seem to occupy our airwaves of audio and video content, but I want to call for a cease-fire on the hate talk and cruel spirited talk that is considered a norm today. Stop it! Nothing can suck the life-giving oxygen out of a room more than hate talk and mean spirited attitudes.

Proverbs 15:1-2
[1] A gentle answer deflects anger, but harsh words make tempers flare. [2] The tongue of the wise makes knowledge appealing, but the mouth of a fool belches out foolishness. …

2. Unique is Awesome. I mean it. This group of misfit kids were being raised by misfit adults that had totally given up on their future. I’m now sixty years old and I’ve got dreams of what I want to conquer and create, like never before. These are the things that wake me up every morning. Somewhere along the way, we must continue to give kids an opportunity to celebrate their weirdness. I am an odd bird. I think counter culturally and I am drawn to folks that think counter culturally. America was birthed on the unique concept that all people have great value. Friends, we must stop telling people, with our words and attitudes that they are somehow less valued than we are. If you claim to be a Follower of Jesus, walk, talk and live with a graciousness that comes from being a Child of the King!

“The only humility that is really ours is not that which we try to show before God in prayer, but that which we carry with us in our daily conduct.” Andrew Murray

“True humility is not thinking less of yourself; it is thinking of yourself less.” ― C.S. Lewis

3. True, Unscripted Authenticity is Powerful. I watched this fictional little girl, known as a bed wetter be belittled and picked apart. The back story was that her mother had passed away and her daddy was ill equipped, in his own grief to be a healthy daddy. I understood that more than most folks. But still, this little girl and her band of equally authentic friends took that emotional trigger of anxiety and in it, discovered authentic community and joy. If only our messed up, self-centered, mean-spirited adult world could simply discover joy in who we are and in all that God made us to be!

“For you know the grace of our Lord Jesus Christ, that though he was rich, yet for your sake he became poor, so that you through his poverty might become rich.”
2 Corinthians 8:9

“But he gives us more grace. That is why Scripture says: “God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble.”
James 4:6

As I wrap this up, I realize that this movie would never take America by storm or win any accolades on a red carpet. It’s not a “Christian film,” or filled with stars. It’s just a movie that moved me to write about these three life lessons.

Please don’t read between these lines and make the assumption that I have arrived in these three areas, but God knows that I desire to do so. May we become a people that want to make America great by the people of God becoming more like He asks and calls us to be.

Go in Peace,
AChuck

KeyBoard Warriors

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My Pop used to have a good word for folks with a poor mouth. He’d say, “If you haven’t got anything good to say, it’s your fault.” Pop was a wise man, with a guarded tongue.

I’ve noticed how critical and calloused the world has become, haven’t you? It’s as though we have the willpower of a cockroach when it comes to the critique of others. I remember the first time that I heard the terms, “armchair quarterback and backseat driver.” The implication of those phrases are that it is pretty stinking easy to sit in the cheap seats and critique the players on the field. It’s even easier to try and make the right calls from a distance. But hey, we live in a world where keyboards are the weapon of choice.

I’ve been in full time ministry, public speaking and the pastorate long enough to know that the only way to not be criticized is to never do anything, say anything or write anything. I’ve also experienced enough criticism to know that there are times when it is helpful and beneficial for everyone involved.

I’m one of those folks that has never professed to being one of the extraordinarily bright people. If you’ve been reading my posts over the past few years, you already know that. I am however, someone that is making an effort to better the lives of as many people as possible through the work and ministry of Sugar Hill Church, podcasts, teaching, coaching, writing, raising funds and serving wherever possible. Don’t get me wrong, I’m a knucklehead at times. I’m self-centered, sinful and occasionally angry. And yet, the Lord continues to use the foolish, thank the Lord.

I’ve determined that although the world of social media is filled with praise for folks that have a quick wit and a sharp response, that’s not what I choose to do with my keyboard. And, like me, you have a choice of what to do with yours, as well.

I served with a fella, years ago that is really bright, witty and always on the hunt for a post or article to attack. Bless his heart, he’s never enjoyed the freeing feeling of offering up an original thought, but he can slam the door on somebody’s writing and quotes like a champ. I’ll bet that many of you know a person like that. On behalf of all the authors and creators out there, I’m so sorry you have to hear from these small minded, gutless and critical-spirited bullies that only peek out from behind their keyboards when in the friendly confines of like minded people.

Here is my recommendation for you, as you move forward with your creation. Drop these critical spirited folks from your list and block them on your social media platforms. Or you could do the more difficult thing and tolerate their often wicked critique until you are so jaded that you laugh out loud as you read their bully replies and critiques. Come on folks! We are better than that, right?

It’s easy to offer blistering critique from a thousand miles. I doubt that many of these folks would say the same things to you face to face. Keyboard Warriors are like that. Keep on creating and keep efforting to instigate better in this messed up world. Taylor Swift was right. “Haters gonna hate.”

I’m reminded of Dr. Kent Keith’s Paradoxical Commandments. Especially number ten, “Give the world the best you have and you’ll get kicked in the teeth. Give the world the best you have anyway.”

Thanks for Reading,
AChuck

Three Simple Steps to a Better Marriage

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Three Simple Steps to a Better Marriage, by AChuckAllen

I’ve been married twice. Once for 25 years and again for 13 years. Over the collective 38 years I’ve learned three things that can improve and strengthen every single marriage. After my first wife passed away in 2005, I was determined that I would be single and travel to every NFL stadium and every MLB stadium and settle down in a quiet little town in Southwest Florida. Two years later, I fell in love and asked Jenny and her four girls to marry me an my two girls. 13 years later, I’m happy, healthy and almost to the end of college tuition for 6 daughters. Just praise the Lord!

In the 38 years of marriage I’ve learned these three very simple elements that will benefit every marriage, at any stage. Here you go:

Be kind and be gracious with your spouse.
Never stop using words of gratitude and grace. Speaking kindly and use words of affirmation and value. Determine to be more gracious with your spouse than you would any dignitary you were trying to impress at a party. Your spouse knows when you are breaking out your finest fake graciousness. Keep it real and keep it consistent. Here are four phrases that remain powerfully poignant in every marriage.

I love you every single day and cannot wait to see you tonight
I’m so sorry. I would never want to hurt you. Please forgive me.
Thank you. I am so glad we are us.
I prayed for you today. Thank you for being my sweetheart.

Keep talking about the things that matter.
BUT! Keep listening to what is being said as urgently as you speak. Never rob your spouse of their voice. We all need conversation and we all grow together as we chat and converse about what each other thinks about any number of topics. Jenny and I talk about everything and disagree and some things. But she makes me a better thinker. She has made me a better speaker. And, she has made me a better listener.

Allow your spouse to be your number one encourager, critic and accountability partner.
When you build trust in your marriage, you will find that you can encourage each other easily. Use words of truthful affirmation, like; You look great. You do so much for us, thank you. When trust is strengthen you can also encourage your spouse by making them better by speaking truth into their life, like; You are such a wonderful influence on our family, but when you lose it, the kids and I see the less than the wonderful you. And, when you allow your spouse to be your number one accountability partner, trust and contentment are a hand and glove experience. Share every password, every calendar, every account and your every moment with your spouse and truth will not only make your life more peace-filled, but it will literally build a force-field around you that will protect your peace when circumstances want to destroy it.

Thank you for joining me on today’s article. I’d love for you to join me each weekday for five minutes of PEACE, POWER & DIRECTION on my Weekday Meditation. Just five minutes each day and five days each week. A simple, guided, prayerful meditation designed for busy, thoughtful folks, desiring God to show up in their daily lives.

Go in Peace,
AChuck

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