Achuckallen

Instigating Better

Emotional Health

4forFRIDAY with Chuck Allen

by

Week fifteen of 2023 is almost in the books, and it has been a great week, including a full day of fly-fishing. I trust that yours has been tremendous and that YOUR WEEKEND AHEAD WILL BE AWESOME! I’d like to share a prayer from Anne Lamott – “Here are the two best prayers I know: ‘Help me, help me, help me’ and ‘Thank you, thank you, thank you.”

Four Lessons That I Learned This Week.

1. Remember that Everyone is Going Through Something. This is an absolute truth. Everyone I meet is going through something. Our goal is to recognize and empathize.

2. Embrace Imperfection. You are imperfect as much or more than that person you see imperfection in. The goal isn’t perfect. It’s practice. Consistent instigation of better.

3. You are Loved. Remember that God loves you, and you cannot do anything to make Him not love you!

4. Enlisting Help is a Sign of Strength, Not Weakness. Far too often, we do not seek help in an effort to “soldier on.” Trusting that you need help and asking for it is a superior strength, not a point of weakness.

This Week’s 4forFRIDAY

A Band that I Am LOVING! Trombone Shorty.

A Book that IS SOOOOOOO GOOD! A Curious Faith: The Questions God Asks, We Ask, and We Wish Someone Would Ask Us by Lore Ferguson Wilbert.

A Really Good Article from Alan Stein, Jr.: THE 3 MANTRAS OF HIGH PERFORMING LEADERS

A Powerful Slideshow from Crosswalk: 10 Churches You Might Want to Avoid

A Quote from Lore Ferguson Wilbert:

“I need a God who doesn’t just give me what I want when I want it but who shows up in the middle spaces – who reminds me of his nearness, goodness, faithfulness, and presence. And if I don’t sense those aspects of God today. I need to keep asking for it and not just some temporary relief of my most pressing desires today.”

Go in Peace, Chuck

Removing the News Improved My Mental Health

by

Breaking Free: How Disconnecting from the News
Improved My Mental Health

In a world where we’re constantly bombarded with news and information, it can be challenging to take a step back and focus on our well-being. That’s why I recently decided to disconnect from the news entirely – and let me tell you, it was one of the best decisions I’ve ever made for my mental and emotional health. In today’s article, I’ll share my experience with breaking free from the constant stream of headlines, how it impacted my mental state, and why you might want to consider doing the same. So sit back, relax, and prepare to learn about an alternative way to approach your daily dose of current events.

Why I Decided to Disconnect from the News

I used to be a news junkie. I would watch the news first thing in the morning while I enjoyed my coffee and again at night before bed. In addition, I would check my phone constantly for breaking news alerts and read articles online throughout the day. But eventually, I realized that the constant diet of bad news was taking a toll on my mental health. I was ingesting bad news that became toxic to my soul.

I started feeling anxious and stressed constantly, and I had trouble sleeping at night. I knew I needed to change, so I decided to disconnect from the news for a while.

It’s been more than a year now since I’ve last watched the news regularly. And it’s been one of the best decisions I’ve ever made. I no longer feel like I’m constantly on edge, waiting for the next terrible thing to happen in the world. And instead of starting my day with negativity, I now begin with something that makes me happy – meditation, gratitude, and scripture.

If you’re feeling overwhelmed, maybe it’s time for you to take a break too. You might find that it does wonders for your mental well-being.

When it comes to the news, we are constantly bombarded with stories of tragedy, pain, and suffering. It’s easy to become fixated on the negative and forget all the good happening in the world. By disconnecting from the news, you can give yourself a much-needed break from all of the negativity and focus on the things that matter most to you. Most importantly, you can reframe your perspective and attitudes toward things you can control.

Here are some of the benefits of disconnecting from the news:

  1. You’ll feel less stressed and anxious.

The constant stream of bad news can be extremely stressful and anxiety-inducing. If you find yourself feeling overwhelmed by the news, it might be time to take a break. Disconnecting from the news will allow you to relax and de-stress.

  1. You’ll have more time for things that really matter.

If you’re spending too much time glued to the news, it’s likely that you’re not doing other things that you enjoy or that are important to you. Disconnecting from the news will give you back some of your precious time so that you can focus on what matters most to you.

  1. You’ll sleep better.

If you’re finding it difficult to sleep because you’re worrying about what’s happening in the world, disconnecting from the news can help. Once you disconnect, you’ll be able to relax and get a good night’s sleep without worrying about what’s going on in the world.

Improved Mental Health

When I disconnect from the news, I improve my mental health in several ways.

First, I no longer feel anxious about the state of the world. I don’t spend my time worrying about things I can’t control and have no influence over. This reduces my stress levels and helps me to feel more relaxed. When I stop taking stress in, I am making a critical decision to leave stress out of my life. Don’t keep swallowing a poison that you know is killing you.

Second, disconnecting from the news allows me to connect with people in a different way. When I’m not focused on the latest headline, I can talk with people about things that matter to us both. This strengthens relationships and makes me feel more connected to others. It also allows me the sincere ability to say, “no, I wasn’t aware of the latest political miscue or savage theory.”

Increased Productivity

I discovered that staying up-to-date on current events was taking a toll on my mental health. I would get anxious reading about the latest political drama or natural disaster, and I couldn’t seem to stop myself from checking my phone every thirty minutes for updates. You know, it’s a good thing when you realize that your phone was never designed to be an appendage to your body.

Making the switch was not easy at first. When I had some downtime, I had to retrain myself to resist the urge to check the news or scroll through social media. But after a few weeks, I started to notice a difference in my mood and overall well-being. I felt less anxious and more present in my day-to-day life. By the way, being fully present, without the tension of news scandals, is heavenly!

Reduced Stress and Anxiety

It’s no secret that the news can be stressful. From natural disasters to political unrest, there’s always something worrying going on in the world. And with 24-hour news channels and social media, getting caught up in the constant cycle of bad news is easy. I also found it far easier to recognize the difference between news and commentary. I prefer just the news, but let’s face it, there isn’t much “just news” out there.

For me, disconnecting from the news has been a game-changer. It’s helped me to reduce my stress and anxiety levels and has allowed me to focus on more positive things in my life. If you are wondering if your thoughts matter, or if you matter, turn the news off and see your neighbors, your family, and your co-workers up close. You’ll discover quickly that you matter greatly!

Here are three ways that disconnecting from the news has improved my mental health:

  1. I’m less anxious

I felt like I was always on edge when I was constantly consuming the news. I was worried about world events beyond my control, which started affecting my daily life. But since disconnecting from the news, I’ve found that my anxiety levels have decreased significantly. I’m no longer constantly worrying about things that I can’t do anything about, and I’m able to focus on enjoying my life. I encourage you to set aside the relentless barrage of pundit commentary for a meaningful relationship if you are looking for practical ways to build a healthier mental outlook.

  1. I’m more productive

Now that I’ve disconnected from the news, I’ve found that I have so much more free time! I’m able to use that time to be productive and have more energy for my friends, family, ministry, and career.

How to Disconnect from the News

When it comes to disconnecting from the news, you can do a few things to make it easier on yourself. First, try limiting your exposure to news sources. If you find yourself getting anxious or stressed out after reading/watching the news, cut back on how often you check-in. You can also try setting aside specific times to catch up on the latest headlines instead of having the news on in the background all day.

Another helpful tip is to focus on quality over quantity when it comes to your news consumption. When you tune in, try to seek out well-rounded and trusted sources that offer objective reporting. This will help you avoid getting caught up in sensationalized stories that can unnecessarily upset you. Finally, remember to take breaks from the news every now and then – even if just for a few days. It’s important to give yourself time to relax and recharge away from the constant stream of information.

By following these tips, you can help reduce your stress levels and protect your mental health from the negative effects of too much news consumption.

  • Set Boundaries and Limits on Your News Consumption

While staying informed is important, taking care of your mental health is also important. That’s why I decided to set some boundaries and limits on my news consumption.

I don’t completely avoid the news. I still read the headlines every morning to keep up with what’s going on in the world. But I limit myself to just a few minutes of reading/watching and try and avoid getting too caught up in the details. I also make sure to take breaks from the news throughout the day.

Consider setting some boundaries for yourself. It might just be what you need to improve your mental health.

  • Find Alternative Sources of Information and Inspiration

When it comes to the news, we are constantly bombarded with negativity. There is endless stories about violence, crime, natural disasters, and political turmoil. Getting caught up in the negative cycle and feeling like the world is scary can be easy.

But what if we took a step back and looked at the bigger picture? What if we focused on the positive things happening in the world?

There are plenty of alternative sources of information and inspiration out there. Here are a few of our favorites:

  1. TED Talks: These talks offer a unique perspective on a wide variety of topics. You can find talks on everything from science and Technology to education and design.
  2. The Denison Forum has a Christian perspective on a limited amount of news.
  3. The Pour Over is a daily recap of news and gives you a scriptural perspective by connecting verses that apply to the headline.
  4. Local News: Check your local news, weather, and sports.
  5. The Weekday Podcast offers a brief scripture and commentary to encourage you each Monday through Friday.

Tips for Maintaining a Healthy Balance Between Connectedness and Disconnectedness

Maintaining a healthy balance between connectedness and disconnectedness can be difficult in today’s 24/7 news cycle. Here are some tips for finding that balance:

1. Limit your news consumption. It’s important to stay informed, but you don’t need to consume the news 24/7. Pick a few trusted sources and limit yourself to checking them once a day.

2. Take breaks from social media. Social media can be a great way to stay connected but can also be a major source of stress and anxiety. If you’re feeling overwhelmed, take a break from social media and give yourself some time to disconnect.

3. Make time for yourself. In our busy lives, it’s important to make time for ourselves. Whether it’s taking a few minutes to meditate or going for a walk, find ways to nurture your mind and body. This will help you feel more balanced and grounded.

Taking a break from the news can be an incredibly beneficial step toward improving mental health and overall well-being. Not only is it refreshing to disconnect from the anxiety and fear-inducing stories, but taking a break also gives us more time to focus on ourselves and participate in activities that bring joy or relaxation. If you’re feeling overwhelmed by current events, don’t forget that taking a news detox might just be what you need – even if it’s just for a few days!

Go In Peace, Chuck

When Life Stinks, Remember the Good

by

Keys to Change: Remember the Good When It Feels Like Life Stinks

Life can be tough sometimes. You may feel like you’re stuck in a rut, and nothing seems to go your way. But here’s the thing: even when it feels like life is against you, there are still good times to remember.

In this week’s article, let’s explore how to keep those positive memories alive and use them as a source of strength during challenging times. So sit back, relax, and get ready to learn some powerful techniques that will help you look on the bright side no matter what! Not for the sake of a pollyanna perspective, but rather with a helpful, powerful way to reimagine your reality.


We all have positive memories from the past that make us happy. These could be moments spent with loved ones or trips you’ve taken in the past. Whatever it is, these memories can often provide comfort and stability when life seems to be going against you. To ensure you stay focused on the good times, it’s essential to take time to reflect on them regularly.

When you read about the life of King David, that dude had some really stinking days. He knew the good, the bad, and the ugly. He knew victory, defeat, adoring fans, and the sting of ego run amuck. But David also wrote in Psalm 103.2, “Let all that I am praise the LORD; may I never forget the good things he does for me.”

David is fired up about the remembrances of all God has done for him in his recent and distant past. Unfortunately, when I feel confident that my life is in the drainage ditch, I do not remember all God has done for me; I can turn into a victim, a whiner, and a not-very-fun human to be around.

Remembering God’s grace in, through, and on my life allows me to worship and feel freedom, peace, and happiness. Remembering that he cares about me daily reminds me that he is so good and we will be okay, especially when we choose to rest in Him.

When I choose to remember God’s grace, I keep myself from falling into victim mindsets that do nothing good for me and certainly do not bring Him glory. Remembering that He is my portion, strength, and power allows me to see past the petty things of life and focus on what matters most. I desperately need to be reminded when life feels like it stinks of all God’s benefits.

I must remember to choose to remember!

I can let my negative bias run away with my head and my heart if I am not careful.

One way to stay on top of remembering good is through journaling. Writing down your fondest memories can help bring them back to life and remind you of the good times despite challenging times. Capture the big and small things that God has done for you. The power of writing is significant. Maybe you think more linear than narrative? Then capture your thoughts with bullets, not paragraphs. Bullets are better for me.

Another powerful tool for keeping good times alive is music. Creating a playlist of fun or encouraging songs from your past will allow you to revisit those moments each time you listen to them. Music has been used throughout history as a way to evoke emotion and reconnect with fond memories, so why not use it to your advantage? I have four playlists that are my go-to when I start getting bogged down in believing life stinks. 1) classic rock 2) funky southern rock 3) Christian power praise 4) worshipful anthems.

It’s easy to forget the good times when life stinks. But it’s important to remember the good times, even when things are tough. Why? Because remembering the good times can help you see that things aren’t always bad. And, when you see that things aren’t always bad, it can give you hope that things will get better. David says, “man, life can stink, but look at all God has delivered me through already – let’s do this!”

So, how do you remember the good times when it feels like life stinks? Here are some tips:

  1. Keep a journal. Add this habit to reading scripture.
  2. Pray out loud. I can’t explain it, but it’s powerful.
  3. Talk about your happy memories with friends and family. When you share your memories with others, they become even more special. Especially the spiritual tracks that you’ve shared with friends.
  4. Write about your happy memories on social media. Sharing positive experiences with others can help brighten their day—and yours!
  5. Create a playlist of songs that remind you of happy times. Music can be a powerful way to evoke memories and emotions.

What Causes Us to Focus on the Negative?

We all have experienced moments where it feels like life is against us. Times when we focus on the negative and can’t seem to remember the good times. What causes us to focus on the negative?

There are several factors that can contribute to this negativity bias, including:

-Human Evolution: Our ancestors who were able to focus on potential threats and danger survived while those who didn’t, well, didn’t. So, we’ve grown more attuned to potential threats and dangers. And yet, we cannot seem to concur with this one truth. We should never believe everything our brain thinks.

-The media: The news is filled with stories of tragedy and disaster because that’s what sells. We are bombarded with images and stories of violence, crime, natural disasters, etc. This constant stream of negativity can influence our own thinking and make us more likely to focus on the negative in our own lives. Take a news fast starting right now!

-Negative experiences: Unfortunately, bad experiences often impact us more than good ones. A single negative experience can color our perception of a situation or person. And once we’ve formed a negative opinion, it’s hard to change it. When I have 200 compliments about a talk, and one negative statement, I remember the negative to the power of about 300, and nothing else matters. That’s when, like David, I must be reminded of how much negativity God has already carried me through.

-Spiritual Warfare: It’s pretty real, friends. Satan would love to have you thinking life stinks and distract you from all your Creator has in store for you. God has good in store for you, and this world is rigged to rob it from you if you stay in the mope-a-dopes about your days. Don’t give Satan an easy win.

Fortunately, there are things you can do to counterbalance this negativity bias and remember the good times even when life is tough. Some tips include:

-Make a conscious effort to pay attention to the positive things in your life, no matter how small they may be. Acknowledge them and give yourself credit for them. See God at work in everything from a rainbow to a parking spot.

-Spend time with positive people who lift you and help you focus on the good things in life—especially the things of God and God’s narrative. I am convinced that when we openly speak about the good things of God, good things follow.

-Take a break from the news and media if it’s becoming too overwhelming. If you want to replace it with something great, watch The Chosen.

-Practice mindfulness to stay in the present moment and appreciate what is happening now. Allow your prayer life to intersect with the rest of your life. Intentionally look for God to do good things in you and for you.

It can be tough to remember the good times when it feels like life is against you. But thankfully, there are some strategies you can use to help you out. Here are four methods to remember good moments:

  1. Write them down – JOURNAL!!!

One of the best ways to remember specific good moments is to write them down as soon as they happen. This way, you that you can refer to it later. Not only that but writing about your positive experiences can help boost your mood in the present moment.

  1. Take photos or videos.

Another great way to capture and remember good moments is to take photos or videos of them. This way, you can revisit the experience any time you want by looking at the visual record you created. And, just like with writing things down, taking photos or videos of happy moments can also help boost your mood in the present moment. Finally, share with people, so they can share and encourage you, especially outside of social media.

3. Reflect on them regularly.

One of the best things you can do to ensure that you remember good moments is to reflect on them regularly. This could mean setting aside some time each day to recall positive memories, or simply taking a few moments throughout the day to appreciate those happy experiences. Doing this will help you stay connected to the good in your life, no matter what else is going on. Build a spiritual habit to capture a few things that you are grateful for, and write them down! Reviewing them will give you a attitude of gratitude.

Building Healthy Habits to Celebrate the Good Times

When you’re feeling down, it can be hard to remember the good times. But it’s important to focus on the positive moments in your life, even when things seem tough. Here are some tips for building healthy habits to celebrate the good times:

  1. Make time for yourself. It’s important to schedule time into your day or week just for yourself. Whether it’s taking a gym class, going for a walk, or reading your favorite book for 15 minutes, make sure you’re carving out time to do things that make you happy.
  2. Spend time with folks that are significant to you. Surround yourself with people who make you feel good and who support you. This could be family, friends, or even a pet. Laughter is known to boost your mood, so try to spend time laughing with loved ones as often as possible. Don’t let yourself think too seriously about every moment of every day.
  3. Get moving. Exercise releases endorphins, which have mood-boosting effects. So get your body moving however you can – go for a run, dance around your living room, or take a fitness class at the gym. My preferred exercise is headphones on, classic rock blaring and walking my dogs.
  4. Be mindful of what you eat and drink. Eating slightly healthier foods and staying hydrated can help improve your mood and energy levels. Make sure to drink plenty of water throughout the day!
  5. Practice gratitude. When you start feeling down, take a moment to think about all the things and ways God is caring for you.

It can be easy to focus on the negative aspects of life when it feels like everything is going wrong. However, it is essential to remember the good times as well. Good memories can help you overcome tough times and remind you that there are still good things in your life worth fighting for.

Don’t choose to believe life stinks, not when there is so much to be excited about, including you are alive right now! Remember David’s Psalm, “Let all that I am praise the LORD; may I never forget the good things he does for me.”

Go in Peace, Chuck

KEEPING YOUR MARRIAGE FRESH

by

Five Tips For Keeping Your Marriage Fresh And Strong

Having a strong and healthy marriage takes effort and dedication. Whether you’ve been married for a few years or decades, it’s essential to keep the spark and connection alive. In today’s article, we’ll explore five tips to help you do just that—avoiding the stale routine of your daily life and reigniting your relationship. Read on to find out more!

Let’s Start with Communication

In any relationship, communication is vital. This is especially true in marriage. When you’re married, you’re sharing your life with someone else, and communicating effectively is crucial to maintain a strong relationship. Communication is far and away the most significant challenge of all the marital challenges I hear about in my office. The Bible says that the state of the heart comes out of the mouth. In other words, you cannot hide what is truly in your heart. It’s coming out of your mouth sooner or later, usually sooner.

Here are five tips for keeping your communication strong in marriage:

  1. Talk openly and honestly with each other. Marriage is built on trust, so it’s essential to be open and honest with each other about your thoughts and feelings. If you’re feeling something, say it. Don’t bottle things up. Trying to appease with silence while needing to be heard is a recipe for marital disharmony on a large scale. Talk with each other – regularly, about everything.
  2. Listen to each other. It’s not just about talking. It’s also about listening. Really listen to what your spouse is saying and try to understand their perspective. If you need clarification, ask. Without defensiveness, simply ask. Assumptions are killers in communication.
  3. Be patient with each other. Sometimes you don’t see eye-to-eye, but it’s important to be patient with each other and work through disagreements calmly and respectfully. The keywords here are calm and respectful. I’m not suggesting that accomplishing that is easy, but it is essential.
  4. Show appreciation and value for each other. Take the time to show your spouse how much you appreciate and value them – whether through words or actions (or both). A little appreciation can go a long way in a marriage! When we stop conveying gratitude, we start lessening value. When we start lessening value, love begins to dissipate greatly.
  5. Pray together often. Keep the lines of communication horizontally (with each other) by strengthening your communication vertically (with the Divine). This is a secret sauce for couples of all ages. I am convinced you cannot harbor bitterness, anger, or resentment as the two of you enter God’s throneroom. Don’t dramatize it. Just talk to God about the day ahead and the days just past. He cannot wait to hear from you.

Spending Quality Time Together

It’s no secret that marriages can sometimes become stale. The excitement and passion of the early days can fizzle out, leaving you feeling more like roommates than partners. But it doesn’t have to be this way! You can do plenty of things to keep your marriage fresh and robust. Here are five tips:

  1. Spend quality time together. This means putting away your phones, turning off the TV, and focusing on each other. Have deep conversations, share laughs, and enjoy each other’s company.
  2. Get out of your comfort zone together. Trying new things can help spice up your relationship and rekindle the spark. Whether exploring a new hobby or taking a trip to an exotic destination, breaking out of your routine will excite your marriage. Even a simple old habit like bowling, roller skating, or a cheap date night can invigorate your relationship.
  3. Be thoughtful and romantic with each other. Sometimes it’s the little things that mean the most in a relationship. Make sure you’re showing your partner how much you care, whether with a heartfelt gift or simply telling them how much you love them every day. Leave a love note. Bring home flowers. Just keep in mind that marriage is like all of life. What you reap, you sow.
  4. Communicate openly and honestly about everything – both the good and the bad. Marriage is all about communication, so ensure you always share your thoughts and feelings. It’s the only way to grow closer as a couple truly. Hey husbands, this includes the recap of your day!
  5. Keep the physical intimacy alive in your marriage. This doesn’t just have to be about having sex. Often, the most intimate things are a simple kiss, holding hands, or even a welcomed hug. Touch is so important and so fun. Don’t miss God’s gift of feeling loved through physical touch.

Setting Boundaries

It’s important to set boundaries in your marriage to keep it strong and fresh.
Here are five tips for doing so:

  1. Make time for each other. Set aside time every week to reconnect with your spouse. This can be as simple as going on a date night or having a weekend getaway. The key is consistency.
  2. Communicate openly and honestly. Marriage isn’t always easy, but it’s important to communicate about what’s going on in your life. This will help you stay connected and work through any challenges together.
  3. Respect each other’s space and privacy. It’s important to respect each other’s needs for space and privacy. This doesn’t mean you have to agree on everything, but it does mean respecting each other’s point of view.
  4. Be willing to compromise. In any relationship, there will be times when you need to compromise to move forward. If you’re both willing to meet in the middle, it’ll help keep your marriage strong. The goal is to stop trying to prove you are right and start making things right!
  5. Seek help if needed. If you’re struggling in your marriage, don’t be afraid to seek professional help together. This can be a great way to get back on track and improve your relationship overall.

Understanding Each Other’s Needs

In any relationship, understanding what your spouse needs and wants is essential. It can be easy to get caught up in your own life and thoughts and forget to ask your spouse about their day or how they’re feeling. Be cautious not to fall into the trap of “but they should know what I mean, or they should know what I need.” More often than not, they cannot read your mind or your emotions.

One way to proactively keep your marriage strong is by regular check-ins with each other. This can be done in person, via text, or even over the phone if you’re both busy during the day. Simply asking how your partner is doing and what they need from you can go a long way. My favorite part of each day is when Jenny asks me what each day’s highs, lows, and challenges are, and I return the same questions with her.

Remember that everyone is different and will have different needs at different times. One day your partner may want nothing more than a hug, while another day, they may need you to handle all the logistics for dinner so they can relax. Pay attention and be fully present for them when they need you.

And finally, don’t forget to communicate your own needs as well! If you’re feeling overwhelmed or like you’re not getting enough attention, speak up. A happy marriage is one where both partners feel heard and supported. This builds and conveys value, trust, and love!

Good communication is vital to a successful marriage. Understanding each other’s needs can keep your relationship healthy, secure, and full of love.

Keeping the Romance Alive

It can be easy to let the romance slide in a long-term relationship. Life gets busy, kids come along, and suddenly you and your partner are more like roommates than lovers. But it’s essential to keep the spark alive in your marriage—not just for your own happiness, but for the sake of your relationship. Here are five tips for keeping the romance alive in your marriage:

  1. Make time for each other. It’s important to carve out time together as a couple, even if it’s just a few minutes every day. Whether you take a walk together after dinner or spend an evening together on the sofa, make sure you have quality time together without distractions.
  2. Plan special outings and date nights. Sometimes, a change of scenery is all it takes to bring some excitement back into your relationship. Plan an overnight getaway or a special evening out with just the two of you. And don’t forget to keep the romance going during regular date nights by trying new things and mixing up your routine.
  3. Get physical! Physical touch is integral to intimacy, so ensure you’re showing affection through hugs, kisses, and sex—whatever works for you as a couple. If you’re not feeling sexual now, find other ways to be close physically, such as cuddling or massage. You’re welcome.

Marriage is one of the greatest joys in life, and it can be made even richer with intentional effort. I trust that these tips for keeping your marriage fresh and strong have given you some ideas to strengthen your bond with your spouse. Whether you’re looking to spice things up or deepen the friendship between the two of you, these tips will help create a stronger relationship built on understanding and love.

Go in Peace, Chuck

It’s Monday – Let’s Kill It!

by

Monday Motivation: How To Make Every Day A Little Better

Mondays can be challenging. The start of the week, coming off a fun weekend, can sometimes feel like a drag. But with the right motivation, it doesn’t have to be that way! Learn how to make every day great with these tips on Monday Motivation.

Monday starts a new week and a chance to reset your goals. For some people, this means setting aside time to work on their fitness or eating healthy. Others may use Monday to focus on their mental health or productivity. No matter your goals, there are ways to make every day a little better.

Here are some tips for making Monday (and every day) a little better:

1) Make time for yourself: Whether taking a few minutes to meditate, going for a walk, praying, reading your Bible, or favorite book, make sure to carve out some time for yourself each day. This is time you can use to recharge so that you can be your best self for the rest of the day. This is worth rising just 15 minutes earlier. The benefits far outweigh the extra time in bed.

2) Set realistic goals: It’s easy to get overwhelmed by all the things you want to accomplish in a day (or week). To avoid this, set realistic goals for yourself and break them down into small steps that you can complete efficiently. This way, you’ll feel good about completing your goals and be less likely to get bogged down by them. Build a habit of creating your “top 3” things you need to accomplish on Sunday night. You will rest better and be better prepared when Monday comes. Keep your list short and bite-sized. The dopamine hit you get when checking off a part of the “big 3” is awesome!

3) Find something to look forward to. Having something positive to focus on can make even the most challenging days more bearable. Whether it’s looking forward to your favorite TV show at the end of the day or planning a fun weekend activity with friends, find something that you can look forward to. My favorite is to look forward to Monday night dinner out. Everybody goes out on Friday. Why not go eat out without the wait on Monday?

It’s Monday morning, and time to start the week off right! One of the best ways to do this is by setting weekly goals. ThIt’sill help you stay on track and motivated throughout the wit’s

  • Make sure your goals are specific, measurable, achievable, relevant, and time-bound (SMART).
  • Write your goals down and refer to them often. Keep them in front of you!
  • Share your goals with a friend or family member to hold yourself accountable.
  • Give yourself small rewards along the way as you reach your goals.

It’s easy to let the weekdays become a blur of monotony, but it’s important to find the little things to make every day meaningful. Here are a few tips on how to do just that:

  1. Wake up with a positive attitude: Start your day off on the right foot by setting the intention for a great day. Give yourself a pep talk in the mirror or write affirmations to remind yourself of your extraordinary qualities. When you start with gratitude, everything changes. Science proves that written gratitude and affirmations are wildly more effective than just thinking about them.
  2. Do something nice for someone else: Make someone else’s day by performing a random act of kindness. Make it not so random, and give it some thought. It doesn’t have to be monetary, just thoughtful. Buy them coffee, hold the door open, or compliment them.
  3. Make time for your passions: Whether taking a cooking class, going for a hike, or reading your favorite book, make sure to schedule some activities that make you happy. Living in your desired zone each day will keep you from falling into the trap of staying in your drudgery zone. Make something happen to enjoy your day or at least part of it. My day always includes some music, reading, and sports.
  4. Connect with loved ones: Take some time each day to reach out to friends and family, whether it’s through text, social media, or good old-fashioned conversation. I use an app – Streaks – to capture the things that give me joy and make me better spiritually, physically, mentally, and socially. One of my “streaks” is connecting with one of my six daughters daily. That alone gives me great joy.

Here are a Few Practical Tips for a Better Everyday

  1. Get enough sleep: Most people need around eight hours per night. Going to bed and waking up at the same time every day will help regulate your body’s natural sleep rhythm. Sleep affects every part of your mind and body. If you are one of those folks that think you are the exception to this, you are not!
  2. Move More: Walking is a great way to get your heart pumping and improve your fitness level. It has also been proven to make your emotional health greater. I use it to listen to books and sometimes to listen to music as I think about my week or day.
  3. Take a Nap: When feeling overwhelmed or stressed, take a few minutes (10-20) to relax and rejuvenate. A quick nap is often referred to as a power nap. I prefer to think of it as an efficiency nap. That’s because I stay far more efficient when I grab a nap rather than trying to power my way through the afternoon.

We all know that Monday mornings can be tricky. We all have challenging days. Some days are more complex than others, but we all face challenges that can make us feel overwhelmed or discouraged. When you’re having a difficult day, it’s important to remember that you’re not alone. Other people are facing their own challenges, and we all have bad days from time to time.

When your Monday seems insurmountable, take a deep breath and relax. This may seem impossible when you’re stressed, but it’s important to try to calm yourself down. Taking some deep breaths and focusing on relaxing your body can help reduce stress and make it easiwhat’sdeal with whatever is causing your difficult day. My friend, Julie Homrich taught me a valuable lesson, “don’t believe everything your brain thinks.” Things are rarely as bad as we make them in our mind.

Talk to someone who understands. Sometimes talking to someone who has been through similar experiences can be helpful. They can offer support and advice on how to deal with your situation. For many of us, seeking out a coach, counselor, or therapist can be so healthy. Don’t be afraid to do so.

Write down your thoughts and feelings. Putting your thoughts into words can help you process them and figure out what’s causing stress or anxiety. Writing can also be therapeutic and help you release some pent-up emotions that make your day difficult. Again, science has proven that brief journaling of your thoughts can significantly reduce your stress levels.

Also, take a break from technology. Disconnecting from electronics for a while can help you focus on other things and give your mind a break from the constant stimulation of screens. Spend some time away from social media. You’ll be happier and more satisfied without it.

Get your prayer life in order. Make having a conversation with the Divine an essential part your day. Of all the keys to a better Monday, prayer is the essential element. Don’t complicate it. Simply talk to God and then hush to “hear” His responses. If you are married, pray out loud with your spouse. It will radically improve your marriage and your joy.

Monday motivation is an important part of life. It helps us stay focused, organized, and energized throughout the week. We can make every day a little better by taking a few minutes to plan out what we want to accomplish and focus on the positive aspects of our lives. The key is finding what works best for you and embracing it as part of your daily routine. Make Monday Motivation work in your favor, and watch how much brighter your days become!

Go in Peace, Chuck

Mirror Neurons: How They Affect Us And Help Shape Our Lives

by

What if I told you that a particular type of neuron could shape and determine how we interact with others and the world around us? It may sound like something from a science fiction movie, but it’s real – and these are known as mirror neurons. Read on to find out more about how they work and how they can influence us in everyday life.

What are Mirror Neurons?

Mirror neurons are special cells in the brain that fire when we see someone else performing an action. For example, if we see someone else picking up a pencil, mirror neurons in our brain will fire as if we were picking up a pencil. Ever wonder why we “catch a yawn?” It’s because of mirror neurons working in our brains.

Scientists believe mirror neurons are crucial in helping us understand and empathize with others. They may also help us learn new skills by imitating others. The old saying goes, “Want to see who you’ll become in 5 years?” Look at the five people you spend the most time with.  

Research suggests that people on the autism spectrum have difficulty understanding and empathizing with others, which may be due to mirror neurons. More research is needed to confirm this link. Still, it makes sense why so many people on the autism spectrum are super-smart but not necessarily empathetic in interpersonal interactions. I learned recently that you can actually strengthen and train your mirror neurons to build empathy and compassion.

How Do Mirror Neurons Work?

Mirror neurons fire when we see someone else doing something. For example, if we see someone smiling, our mirror neurons will fire, and we will feel happy too. Scientists believe that mirror neurons are essential for social interactions and learning.

Mirror neuron research is still ongoing, but scientists believe these special brain cells play a crucial role in our ability to understand and empathize with others. My first thought when I learned about this from my friend, Julie Homrich, was that this has massive implications for how we equip young people to think creatively and authentically.

Mirror neurons fire when someone performs an action and when another person observes the same action. For example, if you see someone drinking from a cup of coffee, the same neurons in your brain will fire as if you were actually drinking the coffee. Likewise, if you see someone praying, you may be inclined to think more spiritually.

This ability to understand and empathize with others makes mirror neurons unique. They help us feel empathy and connect with others more deeply. Mirror neurons also allow us to learn new skills by observing others. The key is if we learn healthy or unhealthy habits as we mirror.

Some studies have shown that mirror neurons may be responsible for specific social behaviors, such as imitation and conformity. So, the next time you see someone do something, take a moment to think about your mirror neurons at work! Should I strengthen my mirror, or should I break it into pieces?

Regarding mirror neurons, the pros seem to outweigh the cons. For one, they help us understand and empathize with others. Additionally, research suggests that they may also benefit our physical health.

Empathy is essential for social cohesion. It allows us to put ourselves in another person’s shoes and see things from their perspective. This is crucial for building relationships, resolving conflicts, and working together cooperatively. Mirror neurons seem vital in allowing us to develop empathy, enabling us to grow in our relationship with Christ as we become more like Him.

I think we would all agree that the world would be a far better place
if we were to have more people acting like Jesus!

Physical health benefits have also been linked with mirror neurons. For example, one study found that people with damage to their mirror neuron system were more likely to suffer from chronic pain. Additionally, research suggests that mirror neurons may play a role in motor rehabilitation after a stroke or other brain injury. But, again, the positives are determined by what influences us.

There are Potential Downsides to Mirror Neurons

Though much potential for good comes with mirror neurons, there are also potential downsides. One such downside is those mirror neurons could potentially be used to exploit and manipulate people. For example, if someone wanted to get a rise out of another person, they could deliberately do something that they know will trigger the other person’s mirror neurons. Unfortunately, this seems to be the business plan for social media.

Another potential downside is that mirror neurons could contribute to excessive confirmation bias. This is when people only pay attention to information that supports their preexisting beliefs and ignore information that contradicts them. This can lead to problems like echo chambers, where people only expose themselves to ideas and opinions they already agree with. It can also make it difficult for people to change their minds about things even when presented with new evidence. This seems to be a significant issue in America today.

If we cease to learn as we fire only mirror neurons from
what we already think we know, we cease to be lifelong learners.

Mirror neurons help shape our lives profoundly by enabling us to understand others’ feelings and experiences. As research continues, we may discover more about mirror neurons, but one thing is clear: they play a significant role in human behavior and social interaction. Understanding how they work can help us better understand ourselves and others, ultimately contributing to a healthier society. And we could use that.

Next time you recognize your mirror neurons firing, ask yourself, “is this helping you grow more like Jesus?” Or is it making you less like Jesus? You’ll immediately know how healthy your mirrored relationships are.

Choose those five most prominent relationships well. They have a much more significant impact than you might have noticed.

Go in Peace, Chuck