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4forFRIDAY with Chuck Allen

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Week 37 of 2023 is almost in the books. What a week! It’s starting to feel a bit more like Fall in Georgia, but it’s still pretty warm. Football is back and How ’bout them Dawgs? Our season starts in earnest this week against the “Gamechickens” from the other Carolina. Coach Prime seems to be the real deal in Colorado, and I think Florida will give Tennessee a run for their money on Saturday. I trust you’ve had a wonderful week and a fun weekend ahead! Have a great weekend!
Thank you for joining me each week for the 4forFRIDAY.

This Week’s 4forFRIDAY

A Very Interesting Slideshow from Crosswalk: 4 Ways to Change the Course of Poor Communication in Your Marriage

A Really Fun Novel from David Baldacci: The Whole Truth

A Solid Parenting Article that is Super-Relevant Today: How ‘sharenting’ boundaries on social media protect kids’ privacy and trust

A Fun Movie at the Theatre: My Big Fat Greek Wedding 3
No cinematic wonder here, just a bit silly and fun.

A Quote from St. John Chrysostom 
“The waters have risen, and severe storms are upon us, but we do not fear drowning, for we stand firmly upon a rock. Let the sea rage, it cannot break the rock. Let the waves rise, they cannot sink the boat of Jesus”

Go in Peace, Chuck

4forFRIDAY with Chuck Allen

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Week 34 of 2023 is almost in the books. I had a fabulously busy week of meetings, speaking, and serving. I love what I do, and I’m honored to serve the folks I serve with. I trust you’ve had a great week and a fun weekend ahead! Thank you for joining me each week for the 4forFRIDAY.

This Week’s 4forFRIDAY

A Fabulous Podcast with Annie F. Downs and Brandi Wilson on Divorce and Finding Hope After Hardship

A Novel I Loved by Geraldine Brooks: HORSE (you will love this book, I promise)

A Movie We Enjoyed on Netflix: Happiness for Beginners (think the Proposal on the Appalachian Trail)

A Really Great Article: 10 REASONS WE NEED TO READ THE BIBLE EVERY DAY

A Quote from C.S. Lewis: “If you read history, you will find that the Christians who did the most for the present world are just those who thought most about the next.” 

Go in Peace, Chuck

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Meanwhile, In the Middle of the Yucatán

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I spent the last few days in Ichmul and Chikindzonot. Those are not prisons. They are quaint villages in the middle of the Yucatán Peninsula. I’ve traveled to these villages for several years with my good friend, Mauricio Menesses. Mauricio and his wife, Laura, started a mission work in Ichmul that is so fascinating. These villages and several more like them have a few thousand people each. Most families in the villages do not have floors in their thatch-roof homes. Most do not have running water, and many have no power. Windows are rare; families often share their homes with goats, pigs, and chickens. In short, these are desperately poor folks.

AND YET, they are gracious, kind, welcoming, and gracious. They have problems, but they proved something to me again this week. They proved that you can be at peace with little or much. They are dirt-poor yet keep what they have as clean as possible. They work hard with what they have. They have no healthcare, doctors, air conditioning, or entertainment. No WiFi, cable, or restaurants. They are predominately Mayan people with an odd mixture of faith. There is either a zero-faith system or a mix of witchcraft and catholicism. Clean water and food security is a massive challenge. They walk everywhere. A few folks have little scooters or bikes, but most of these kind folks never wander past a few miles from where they were born.

My purpose in traveling to Yucatán is to bring fresh, clean water, food, and faith to this forgotten part of the world. The goal is to build twenty water wells, twenty churches, twenty community gathering spots, food distribution systems, and meaningful work in each village. I know – like I need one more thing to do. But if you could see these folks, you would be amazed at their resiliency. Somehow, they keep going. They keep striving. They keep caring for their children and sweeping their dirt floors.

But all of that isn’t why I am writing today. I’m writing to convey a simple lesson I keep learning from the women, men, and children in these little villages.

THEY ARE GRACIOUS, KIND, WELCOMING, ACCEPTING, AND GENEROUS…AND HAPPY!

Every home that I have visited over the last few years has welcomed me into their homes without reservation. They share what they have. They are friendly. They are willing to accept you as you are without any judgment or comparison. I’m not sure how many homes I have been in, but I’ve easily been in dozens of homes. In each home, I’ve offered three things. I’ve prayed with the entire family. I’ve offered a listening ear and the story of Jesus and His love for them. In every single home, men and women have chosen to accept Jesus as their gift from a loving God. They have discovered a community of faith. Learned to worship together and enjoy the fellowship of a loving church led by men and women just like them!

Can you imagine what would happen if those folks were to knock on your door one day? When you saw their dirty faces, darkened, leathered faces on Ring doorbell cameras,
would you call the cops or open your home to them?
Would you share your food, drink, and living room, even for a few minutes?

That’s okay. I’m not sure that I would, either. Truth.

But these people didn’t shut me down. They didn’t call the cops. They didn’t give me a lecture. They never turned me away. They welcomed me and shared everything they had. And in that small gesture, they proved Paul’s point in the New Testament. He said, “I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength.” But did you know that the precursor to that statement is key to the promise given?
Paul wrote these words…

Philippians 4:11-13
Not that I was ever in need, for I have learned how to be content with whatever I have. I know how to live on almost nothing or with everything. I have learned the secret of living in every situation, whether it is with a full stomach or empty, with plenty or little.
For I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength.

Maybe we folks, here in the Land of the Free and Home of the Brave, have chosen to forget the concept of contentment and exchanged it for greed, selfishness, barbed-wire fences, and our never-ending fight for our rights. Maybe instead of our rights, likes, friends, followers, and platforms, we need to slow this insane pace of life down a bit. We need to know our neighbors and talk with our family. I think we can learn a lesson from the Mayan Yucatán people. Be content with little or with much. Be generous with what we have. Be grateful for what we have instead of pouting and rioting over what we wish we had.

We live in a whacked-out, messed-up world. We live in a radically imperfect nation. But we are more than blessed people. We have problems, but we have problems that are, for the most part, self-inflicted!

Would you be willing to join me in starting each day through the end of July by jotting down two things you are grateful for? Would you be willing to consider opening your home to a neighbor? Would you hold your family tight and thank God for them? AND would you consider praying for the people in the twenty villages that we are attempting to love, serve, and share well?

Please do not read this and assume that I’m doing something special. I am not! I am a blessed man with the privilege of representing you and many more folks like you with the people of Yucatán. Friends, we must learn the secret of how we can do all things through Christ, who strengthens us. And that key is learning to be content with little or with much. Starting with me and my selfish attitude. You and your selfish attitude can join me in this contentment – and gratitude!

Thanks for reading my article today.

Go in Peace,
Chuck

Unlocking The Power Of Prayer: How It Can Enhance Your Child’s Mental Health

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AChuckAllen.com

Prayer can be a powerful tool in helping improve children’s mental health. I want to explore how parents can use prayer to help children cope with life’s struggles and some of the benefits that come with it. Find out how you can unlock the power of prayer and use it to enhance your child’s mental health!

When you pray with and for your child, you open up a communication channel between you, your precious children, and the Creator of the Universe.

This connection can give your child (children) strength, hope, and greater inner peace. Having parented six daughters and now having seven grandchildren, I can confidently say that providing kids with a more profound sense of peace is a critical part of parenting!

Prayer can also help your kids develop a positive outlook on life. You teach them to rely on God for help and guidance as you pray for them. This dependency can lead to a greater sense of purpose and satisfaction in life. Every parent wants this for their kids. That is a great reason to become a prayer warrior! Children that see life through a half-full lens will have a far greater capacity to change the world as opposed to adapting to the world.

In addition, prayer can help reduce stress and anxiety in your kids. As you lift up your concerns to God, He will provide comfort and peace. This will allow your child to focus on the positive aspects of their life and find hope in difficult situations. Again, every kid needs this, and it is available to every parent!

What is the Power of Prayer?

Prayer is a powerful tool that can be used to enhance your
child’s mental, emotional, and spiritual health.

Prayer can also help to create a sense of community and support for your child. As you pray with and for your child, you invite others to do the same. This can create a loving support network to help your kids Children’sunded by love and care.

Prayer is also a way of connecting with your child on a deeper level. As you pray for your child, you send them love and light from the Divine. This can help to strengthen the bond between you and your family and promote healing in their life.

Benefits of Prayer for Children’s Mental Health

There are plenty of benefits of prayer for children’s mental health. Prayer can help children to develop a positive outlook on life, feel closer to God, and cope with difficult situations. Prayer can also help children to develop self-control and to be more patient. Additionally, prayer can help children to become more grateful and humble. One of the most extraordinary things you can give your child is the gift of gratitude. When we raise grateful children, we will see them develop into generous adults!

How to Introduce Prayer to Your Child

Like most parents, you want your child to grow up happy and healthy. And one of the best ways to help them do that is to introduce them to prayer. But it would help if you led the way. It all starts with YOUR MINDSET!

Here are some tips for introducing prayer to your child:

  1. Talk about why you pray. Explain to your child that prayer is a way to talk to God. Tell them it’s okay if they don’t understand everything about it, but that it’s important to you and something you enjoy doing. Don’t feel like you have to explain everything about God. Take the opposite approach and just be honest. Tell them that there are many things we will never be able to understand about God.
  2. Start slow. Don’t force your kids into long prayers or complicated concepts immediately. Keep it simple at first, and let them grow into prayer at their own pace.
  3. Encourage questions. Invite your child to ask you anything they want about prayer or faith. Be open and honest and encourage their curiosity. The key is to let them see you being curious and learning as well.
  4. Help them find their own way. There’s no one right way to pray, so encourage your child to find what works for them. Whether sitting quietly, kneeling, or using words or songs, let them explore and find what brings them comfort and peace. The Lord of all desires His kids to come to Him in honesty. Let your child’s vulnerability be present as they see yours.
  5. Pray together occasionally. You don’t have to pray together all the time. Don’t make prayer a rule, but rather a way of life.

Tips for Incorporating Prayer into Everyday Life

One of the best ways to incorporate prayer into your child’s life is to make it a part of your daily routine. For example, you can pray together before meals, bedtime, or even during the day when something special happens.

Prayer can also be incorporated into other aspects of your child’s life, such as schoolwork or extracurricular activities. For example, you can help them remember to pray before taking a test or participating in a sporting event. Also, teaching your child how to say grace before meals is another great way to help them learn how to incorporate prayer into their everyday lives.

I am often asked about the prayers like “God is great, God is good…” There is nothing wrong with those prayers because prayer is a matter of the heart. There is something wrong with remaining in that prayer when your heart can convey more than rote memorization to the God we are speaking with.

Common Challenges When Teaching Prayer to Children

One of the most common challenges when teaching prayer to children is getting them to actually pray. This can be a difficult task, especially if they are not used to praying or if they are resistant to it. Keep prayer in front of your children, in your life!

Another challenge is getting children to understand the concept of prayer. They may not fully grasp what it means to pray or why it is important. Combat that by talking about God. Awareness is typically part of consistent learning and experiencing.

Finally, another challenge when teaching children prayer is helping them find the time and space to pray. With busy schedules and so many distractions, it can be challenging for kids to find the time and space to truly focus on prayer.

Prayer is a powerful tool for enhancing mental health, especially in children. It can help them build resilience, increase self-esteem, and learn ways to cope with stress. When used regularly as part of a support system, prayer can be an invaluable resource that gives your child the strength they need to face whatever life throws their way. So if you’re looking for ways to help your child develop emotional intelligence and resilience, consider unlocking the power of prayer today!

Go In Peace, Chuck

It’s Beginning to Look a lot Like…Hectic

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Guarding Your Soul This Christmas. By Chuck Allen

I love this time of year, or at least I’ve convinced myself that I do.

I often think that I reminisce of how I’d like to remember Christmas more than I actually love this most wonderful time of the year. With the kids jingle-belling and everyone telling you be of good cheer, well that’s just a line of bull. I have yet to hear anyone jingle-belling, and no person I’ve been around over the past 3 weeks has been sharing good cheer. As a matter of fact, I’m busier than I’ve ever been and everyone I know is stressed to their limit.

But that shouldn’t make for a blue, blue Christmas. It just might need to remind us of what makes this the hap, happiest season of all.

For centuries, we have all basically agreed that what makes this season so wondrous is 1) Christ’s birth, 2) family, and 3) presents. But what if Christmas means a little bit more?

What if Christmas means freedom, peace, and hope?

  1. Christ has come to free us from the tyranny of sin and death. That’s true freedom!
  2. Jesus came to reign and rule as the Prince of Peace. We all need more peace in our lives.
  3. The Son of God came to offer hope for tomorrow and the reality of Heaven.

Okay, Chuck, that’s enough preaching. I need a little help here. Do you know how busy I am? I have no idea how I’m going to get everything done. I cannot be in three places at one time.
There isn’t enough of me to go around, and the expectations are through the stinking roof.
I hear ya! So, here are
FIVE WAYS TO GUARD YOUR SOUL THIS CHRISTMAS.

  1. STOP IN THE NAME OF LOVE! Create a prioritized list of tasks. Then assign days and times to them. Be sure you prioritize each day’s tasks. When you think of a new task, place it in a “parking lot.” A parking lot is a separate page that captures your must do’s to prioritize to a time and day. If you don’t learn this simple habit, your mind will run wild and your negativity bias will run amuck in your head. Make a list, then prioritize, update every evening for the next day. Capture those nagging reminders in your parking lot and move them to tasks as you plan each day. To create a good working list for December, plan for a 20 minute timeframe. To prioritize daily, plan for less than 10-minutes. Stop the merry-go-round and prioritize your tasks. It will change you life!
  2. LET IT GO, LET IT GO! It’s been determined that 90% of what we fear never actually happens and the remaining 10% is most often out of our control. To fear that which probably will not happen is a fool’s errand. To fret over that which you cannot control is to invite stress and anxiety upon you. Let it go! Take hold of what you can control, and that is your attitude and how you respond to adversity and fear. The single greatest way to confront fear is to invest in faith. That’s where the next three items come from.
  3. DO YOU HEAR WHAT I HEAR? Engage in mindful quietude each morning. This might be the single best piece of advice that I’ve written for you. We are a people surrounded by noise, and most of it is our own doing! The rest is created by a world that is paid to grab our attention. Still your soul and use a solid meditation app, like SoulSpace or Glorify. Research has proven that just 5-minutes of mindful quietude can provide huge mental, emotional, and spiritual benefits. If you are running hard and chasing the dream, you’ll eventually hit the proverbial wall. STOP! Crawl out of bed, or finish your evening with 5-6 minutes of mindful quietude and watch how much more at peace you experience in your soul this Christmas.
  4. IN THE MEADOW YOU CAN BUILD A SNOWMAN! I live in Georgia, so it’s not a snowman, but I can build steps. I am living proof of a person that said for years, “I don’t have time to walk.” Well, I don’t have time to live in stress, anxiety, fear, or fret either. The science is in – walking, for most people is as good for you as running. FOR ME, IT CLEARS MY HEAD, AND GETS ME CENTERED WHERE GOD WANTS ME CENTERED FOR THE DAY!

    Harvard Health said it this way:
    • Walking counteracts the effects of weight-promoting genes. Harvard researchers looked at 32 obesity-promoting genes in over 12,000 people to determine how much these genes actually contribute to body weight. They then discovered that, among the study participants who walked briskly for about an hour a day, the effects of those genes were cut in half.
    • Walking helps tame a sweet tooth. A pair of studies from the University of Exeter found that a 15-minute walk can curb cravings for chocolate and even reduce the amount of chocolate you eat in stressful situations. And the latest research confirms that walking can reduce cravings and intake of a variety of sugary snacks. This should help level out those holiday mood swings!
    • Walking eases joint pain. Several studies have found that walking reduces arthritis-related pain, and that walking five to six miles a week can even prevent arthritis from forming in the first place. Walking protects the joints — especially the knees and hips, which are most susceptible to osteoarthritis — by lubricating them and strengthening the muscles that support them.
    • Walking boosts immune function. Walking can help protect you during cold and flu season. A study of over 1,000 men and women found that those who walked at least 20 minutes a day, at least 5 days a week, had 43% fewer sick days than those who exercised once a week or less. And if they did get sick, it was for a shorter duration, and their symptoms were milder.

  5. MARY DID YOU NO! Okay, bad dad pun. But here’s the real deal. Using the overcommitted Christmas season to learn the fine art of saying NO will help you in so many ways. Most of us are people pleasers to varying degrees and learning to say no can save us from ourselves this holiday season. Much of the frustration in my life is created by me, and most of it is because my pride, and pleaser mechanisms are still learning to build healthy boundaries. Boundaries aren’t just fences to keep things out, they are also to keep the right things in. When I allow my ego, pride or desire to please run wild, I create an unsustainable life. At Christmastime, it is heightened to the breaking point. Save yourself a huge frustration and predetermine a few key boundaries which will set the pace for what you will say yes to, and some that you need to say offer a no to. You’ll be a much happier human for Christmastime!

It can still be the most wonderful time of the year, but you have to take control of your season for that to happen. I trust these simple steps will help you experience your greatest Christmas season ever.

Go in Peace, Chuck

This Week’s “I Might Be Wrong, But I Doubt It”

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AChuckAllen August 4, 2022

Have you ever been in the shower or riding down the road thinking, and it hit you that you might be wrong, but you doubt it? Yeah, me too. This week’s article is focused on POLITICS! But, you know the age-old story; avoid politics at the Sunday dinner table if you want to keep the peace. But, here we go. Why do we get so whacked out about politics in America these days?

POLITICS IN AMERICA

America is in an information war – with itself. Our public forums, where we Americans discuss public issues, are broken. There’s little healthy discussion – and plenty of fighting. One reason why: Persuasion is difficult, slow, and time-consuming – it doesn’t make good television or social media content – and so there aren’t a lot of good examples of it in our public discourse. As a result, we have become propagandists, not persuaders. We have chosen the path of picking a side and unfolding a shock and awe campaign of how bad the other side is, regardless of who the other side is.

The old vertical propaganda model cannot withstand the changes in communication brought on by the new participatory media – talk radio, cable, email, blogs, chats, texts, video, and social media.

Pew research says that 93% of Americans are connected to the internet and 82% of Americans are connected to social media. We now all have direct access to communicate in the public square – and, most of us engage at some level in the propaganda machine. A lot of folks use their social media connections and platforms to knowingly and unknowingly spread misinformation, disinformation, conspiracy, and partisan talking points – all forms of propaganda. We’re all propagandists now. At times, we create our own version of dissent.

The inability of Americans to allow for dissenting thoughts has become an epidemic. When we do not allow for common decency in dialogue with those we disagree with, we lose all sense of humanity and turn what could be beneficial for the country into a battle of anger, resentment, and outrage. It doesn’t take long!

Hold your convictions close to you, but be cautious that your convictions are more than preferred thoughts and outcomes. America became America out of appreciation for how our Creator made us uniquely different, and we bond around that rather than fight about why it is the case.

Be sure to leave room for your fellow American to be right, even if it is seldom the case.

Be sure to leave room for you to be wrong, even if it doesn’t happen often.

As a country built on diverse thought, we must accept that wherever diverse thought occurs, conflict is lurking around the corner. Conflict, friend, isn’t the problem.
The problem is mismanaged conflict.

Most conflict is internal. When someone thinks differently than you, they will most likely act, react and vote differently than you. That doesn’t have to make them your enemy. There is a reason that they think that way, and the way they think may have nothing to do with you – at all!

To demonize them without attempting to understand them is doing yourself disfavor! Leave room for that Republican or Democrat to share why. If they don’t know why, other than some talking puppet on an alleged news show, don’t argue; simply step away.

Everyone has the right to be wrong!

If you do find yourself in a heated exchange, be the grown-up in the room and take the heat down. Speaking truth in love is the key here. When we shower others with our worst, we rarely have an opportunity to persuade, we simply become part of the propaganda. Besides, we owe it to the world to lessen the noise and increase the collective IQ.

Step away from the keyboard when you are heated. There is no need to convince others of your lack of control. The country needs men and women of conviction, courage, and wisdom,
not more screaming and banter.

If you want to discuss politics, check your logo and ego at the door and have a clear, common, and compelling reason for what you say. Say it in a way that is helpful, thoughtful, and wise. Be willing to be corrected and be willing to accept differences, and watch how we can find a middle ground.

I might be wrong, but I doubt it.

Go in Peace, Chuck