What Happens When You Don’t Forgive
Have you ever held onto anger or resentment towards someone for far too long? Maybe you’ve experienced the heavy burden of unforgiveness weighing down your heart and soul.
There is a saying that goes, “Holding onto anger is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die.”
This is because when we don’t forgive, we are the ones who suffer the most.
The profound impact of not forgiving others stems from the reasons why it can be challenging to let go of the transformative power of extending grace. So, grab a cup of coffee, and let’s dive into what happens when you forgive and don’t forgive.
Why We Fail to Forgive Others
Sometimes, forgiving someone who has hurt us can feel like an impossible task. We may struggle to let go of the pain and resentment that linger in our hearts, holding onto it as a form of self-protection.
We have all been there! You’ve been hurt, and you just stew on it for days, even months or years. All that time, you are burning what I refer to as “sideways energy.” The best way to describe “sideways energy” is to liken it to carrying a hundred-pound bag of rocks uphill when you could drop it and cruise freely up the same hill.
Fear often plays a significant role in our reluctance to forgive. We fear being vulnerable again, opening ourselves up to potential harm or betrayal once more. Or maybe we just cannot imagine not getting even with whoever offended us. The truth is that getting even never relinquished the fear and burden or shame involved with the offense. It simply grows more deeply in our souls, like a cancer.
Pride can also prevent forgiveness. Admitting that we have been wronged and extending grace requires humility, which can be challenging for many of us, starting with this guy. It can feel like we are losing the battle if we forgive, and we may fear appearing weak or submissive.
Moreover, past experiences of not receiving forgiveness can make it harder to offer it to others. The cycle of unforgiveness perpetuates unless consciously broken.
Someone must be the adult in the room and make a reasonable and wise choice of moving forward without the sideways energy. Let that person be you!
Understanding why we fail to forgive others allows us to acknowledge our own limitations and work towards cultivating a spirit of compassion and empathy.
The Dangers of Unforgiveness
Holding onto resentment and refusing to forgive can have severe consequences for our mental, emotional, and physical well-being.
Here are a few of the dangers of unforgiveness:
When we hold onto grudges and resentments, they create a heavy burden that weighs us down.
Unforgiveness can lead to increased stress levels, which in turn can impact our immune system and overall health.
It keeps us trapped in negative emotions like anger and bitterness, preventing us from moving forward with our lives.
Holding onto unforgiveness can strain relationships with others and damage our own sense of inner peace. It builds walls between people instead of fostering connections and understanding.
The dangers of unforgiveness are far-reaching and pervasive. It robs us of joy, hinders personal growth, and limits our capacity for compassion and empathy towards others.
Letting go of unforgiveness is essential for our own well-being and spiritual growth.
The Emotional and Spiritual Benefits of Forgiveness
When we choose to forgive others, we free ourselves from the heavy burden of resentment and anger that can weigh us down. Forgiveness allows us to let go of negative emotions and find inner peace.
Emotionally, forgiving someone can lead to a sense of liberation and relief. It opens up space in our hearts for love, compassion, and understanding towards ourselves and others.
Spiritually, forgiveness aligns us with the principles of grace and mercy. It reflects a deeper understanding of human imperfection and the power of redemption.
Choosing forgiveness is not always easy, but it can be incredibly healing for our emotional well-being and spiritual growth. By releasing grudges and practicing forgiveness, we pave the way for a more peaceful and fulfilling life.
The Biblical Understanding of Forgiveness
When it comes to forgiveness the Bible teachings emphasize the importance of letting go of grudges and resentments. God encourages us to forgive others as He has forgiven us. It reminds us that holding onto unforgiveness can weigh heavy on our hearts and hinder our spiritual growth.
Matthew 6:14-15 states, “For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.” This passage emphasizes the reciprocal nature of forgiveness in Christianity.
At the very heart of God you will discover one overwhelming reality – His story is designed to be our story – and that story is centered around FORGIVENESS!
The story of Jesus forgiving those who crucified him serves as a powerful example of unconditional forgiveness. His act demonstrates grace and mercy beyond measure, showing us the transformative power of letting go and choosing love over bitterness.
Surely we can all grasp the desperation for a more gracious, loving, and forgiving society!
By embracing forgiveness in accordance with biblical teachings, we open ourselves up to healing and freedom from emotional burdens that keep us from living a life rooted in graciousness.
The Mental Health Benefits of Forgiveness
When we choose not to forgive, we carry the weight of anger, resentment, and bitterness within us. This unforgiveness can lead to strained relationships, increased stress levels, and a negative impact on our mental health.
Without forgiveness, we might miss the beautiful life of a mind and soul at peace.
Choosing to forgive brings liberation and healing. It allows us to let go of negative emotions, find inner peace, and move forward with a renewed sense of purpose.
So let’s strive to cultivate a spirit of forgiveness in our hearts and minds. Let’s choose grace over grudges and unlock the mental health benefits that forgiveness has to offer. As we embrace forgiveness as a way of life, we open ourselves up to experiencing true freedom and joy in every aspect of our being.
Go in Peace, Chuck
